Hello, I am a very hardworking DBA, DBA since 1998, Mostly got 'exceeded expectations' in my reviews. I have always taken my responsibilities very seriously and have delievered successful results under extremely tight and almost impossible deadlines working round the clock. My hours are M-F 8-5 and no 24 X 7 support is required as per my job description. The situation that makes me mad is that after working 70-75 hours this weekend and throughout the weekend, I am expected to come to work the next day. It is very tough for me to balance work life and personal life. I expect that after I sacrifice my weekend for work, I should not have to bother coming in on Monday unless of course there is a need of urgency to get something else done on Monday. My manager thinks that I should not be a DBA. Since I am a mother of 4 year old and obviously just like any parent, I expect comp time after working 3-4 days worth extra in 5 days time, I was suggested ( in friendly manner ) that this field is not for mothers. Is it true??? I never made an issue about being available, being at work past midnight or weekends or whenever needed. My work has always been recognised and appreciated. Then why this kind of mentality? I just asked for some comp-time to handle chores at home after working fulltime this weekend. But I was shocked to hear that if they are male DBAs, they don't care for comp time so much as much as I would like to have. Am I in wrong profession? Do male DBAs with family really don't care about comp time? Is it not appropriate to think about comp time after you have put 18 hours between saturday and sunday? Am I in wrong profession or I just need to find a better employer?? I would like to know from DBAs with family on how they handle workload ( 50-60 hours weeks for several months sometimes extending to over 70 hours ) and is it wrong to ask for comp time?? Thanks,
You dont say where you are based so this may not apply but in the UK we have to comply with the [Working Time directive] that specifies how many hours someone can be expected to work in a week/month/year. Any employer has to abide by this. Aside from the above, if you are outside the EU, I would suggest that if you feel you are not getting a fair deal from your employer that it would be in your own interests to find another one. One that hopefully gives you the sort of conditions that you are happy with. From your description you dont sound as though you dislike being a DBA so I would say you are not in the wrong profession, just that you are not comfortable with your current role. If you enjoy the work, find somewhere else to do it. If you dont like the DBA activities then maybe you should try another profession. :
+1 to Fatherjack - but I will be a bit more blunt: You 100% need to find a better employer. It sounds like there is blatant sexism going on there - because I am male and I care greatly for the time I spend with my children. I would be really surprised if stating that 'this job was not for mothers' wasn't against the law - it certainly is here in the UK. If you find an employer that appreciates you, then you will be happier for it and you will be able to strike a better work/like balance without it causing you stress.
In case you're posting from the US, I'll respond. First, I agree with Matt. Time to start looking. Second, heck yes I expect some form of compensation when that sort of effort is put forth. But, take that with a bit of a grain of salt. When I worked at Dot Com's, the expectation was that we were on a death march, all the time. So we put in insane hours, but the expected compensation was that we'd all own stock in the company and the rewards were to be had down the line somewhere. After three failed dot com's (I learn slowly if at all), I've been working for an insurance company for almost nine years. This place is largely 9-5, five days a week. However, we have on-call duties that are rewarded with a very minor stipend (that I've been collecting for 7 years). And, it is expected that when there are major outages or large scale operations, we'll be here, as a part of our regular salary. But if you pull an all nighter or you spend the entire week end performing an operation, you can get comp time. So, I'd say, it really depends on the situation at the company. DBA salaries are usually higher, because they depend on 24/7 support. But if the employer is abusing that, I'd find another employer. And no, that should not change, positive or negative, because of the person's sex. That's just wrong. Utterly & completely.
I work in the US for a financial holding company. We have and have had many female DBA's over the year. As @Grant Fritchey mentioned above, if we are on death marches then you are expected to be at work, however, if you just pulled a 70 hour workload and the project was succesfull, we don't expect to see you for a few days. We do expect you to be available by phone/email if we need you but thats about it. I will say that most of us even if we are on vacation still keep our PDA's with us and keep up with email but it is not really a requirement, just something we do. I agree with everyone above, first find a new job, then get a dang good attorney. Tim Radney, Daddy of 3 amazing kids.
Run, do not walk, but Run to a new employeer. I've been a production DBA for 10 years, and even before I had kids i insisted on comp time after extended work hours like that. There are employeers out there that will value your drive and expertise. Do yourself and your family a favor and start looking for one. Meredith Ryan-Smith @coffegrl
First, I will agree with Matt that saying this job is not for mothers is sexist and indicates a rather undesireable approach to business. With that said, let me respectfully offer a very different opinion from Matt and Fatherjack on the rest of it. I believe much of this is cultural, since I believe that Matt and Fatherjack are both from Britain where I am from the US. But here, a salaried employee generally does not expect comp time from working anything less than truly excessive hours, and 70-75 hours for a relatively senior person is not considered excessive if it is exceptional rather than routine. In my last job, 50-55 hour weeks was routine with occassional busy times getting above 70 hours. I personally would not want a job that frequently expected me to work above 60 hours a week, but occassional busy times will happen. Also, I do have friends that routinely work well above 60 hours week. Again, this is partially cultural and dependent on your local markets. If you expect to reach the senior ranks in the market to which I am accustomed, you should expect to work well above 40 hours in an average week and be prepared for busy times that exceed it substantially. But it is a question of your priorities and your trade offs. If that is what it takes for advancement where you are and you want that advancement, then it is probably best to simply accept that. On the other hand, if advancement is less important to you and family time is more important, then it makes sense to seek a position that will support that. I can only speak for the local market where I live, but there are some DBA jobs and many database programmer jobs that will not require you to work long hours, unfortunately those also tend to be the ones that pay less now and offer less opportunity for advancement later. In my family, we made the conscious decision that my wife would primarily stay with the children and we accepted that for me to advance in my career would require some late nights. I am of course around for them as much as I can be, but I focus on providing a living for them even if that means not always having as much time for them or myself as I might like. Other families make other decisions. [Edit: Fixed a grammatical error]
As everyone else stated, start looking for another job. I have a female DBA in my team, and gets compensated about the same rate as everyone else. She is a mother too. I do not mind accommodating schedules if she needs to get back home earlier, or if she needs to work from home in the morning. I try to arrange the best scenario for my team for them to deliver; at the end what matters is their quality work and them being happy working for me/for the company. What they are doing there is just plain wrong.
I will add to what the others have said. I care for time with my family and expect a return on time when I have to work a ton of hours as well. It doesn't mean I get those hours. Your boss is in violation of several laws within the US (if you are within the US). I would certainly be looking for a new job if I were in your shoes. In the meantime, I would certainly take the grievances to HR.
Have you talked to your boss and discussed the situation openly? Just to make sure he understands what going through, I say discuss it with your manager/boss on how you can work together to come up with an arrangement that can help you balance work and personal life.(may be work from home a couple of days a week or get day off after working weekends). After clearly communicating with him, if it doesn't work out then start looking for a new job. If he doesn't appreciate you and value your work its better to "Run" to somewhere else. For the record, you are in the right profession:-)